It is one of football's immutable laws, to be ranked alongside Germans winning penalty shootouts at the very top of the list. Had a player called David Dicks. "Why I'm proud to be a Liverpool supporter. Why did Super League invite Arsenal?Because someone has to finish bottom of the group and be okay with it. I set my XBOX password to "Arsenal Defense". A: Nice tattoo Arteta recently went mad at some referee decisions during the draw with Newcastle United and Keys used the Ramsdale incident as an excuse to bring up his favourite narrative, claiming the Spaniard's 'inflammatory behaviour' was to blame. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? Q: Whats the difference between Arsenal F.C. A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Gunners fan? A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. A: They're both empty from the neck up. I will eat the heart Q: Why do Arsenal fans suck at geometry? Q: How do you stop a Gunners supporter from beating his wife? She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Arsenal supporters, too. The general shifted in his seat and looked down at the table. The incident came after Premier League leaders Arsenal put on a masterclass to overwhelm Tottenham and extend the gap at the top to eight points. ", The dealer replies, "It's voice activated. The policeman said to himself I cant let his family see him like this, so before calling them, he took the Spurs shirt off. Shall I call your wife for you?" Mikel Arteta's men moved eight points clear at the top of the Premier League. You can Save the Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans here. England and Wales company registration number 2008885. A: He turns off the PlayStation. There were three football fans one each from the clubs Arsenal, Manchester City and Liverpool they were walking in the desert and found a dead camel. What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur supporter who scores high on IQ tests?A cheat. Great! A: A mosquito stops sucking. Not really knowing what an Arsenal supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. The Lilywhites have managed to finish above those pesky Gooners every season since the last at White Hart Lane and have had a bigger share of wins in the North London Derby in recent years. On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. Arsenal Jokes - IntroductionHello and welcome to the funniest jokes about Arsenal that I could find.Without any further introduction, here are some of the best jokes for FC Arsenal.Dislike Joke About ArsenalWhy do people take an instant dislike to Arsenal?It saves time.Jokes About FC ArsenalWhy do Arsenal fans whistle on the toilet?So they know which end to wipe.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a 3 bedroom semi?A burglar.Hate Jokes ArsenalYou're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. Jessica Amlee A: They can't string three "Ws" together. A tourist is in North London one Saturday and he decides he would very much like to go to a football match, so he asks a man in the street if there are any local matches being played that afternoon. The Gunners have discovered their Europa League fate after being . Explore the lighter side of being an Arsenal fan! Whats a pirates favorite football club?Arrrrrrrsenal. A: Ask an Arsenal supporter! A: I cry when I cut up onions Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Arsenal.' Jokes About Arsenal What do you call an Arsenal fan in a 3 bedroom semi? To see all content on The Sun, please use the Site Map. Ramsdale had been a key figure in the victory . They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands. Youd never do something like that, would you?Of course not! exclaimed her husband. Speaking after the match, the keeper said, "The Spurs fans were giving me some [stick] throughout the second half. Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. A: A good start! ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. 62 NuzzlesK 8 yr. ago What does an Arsenal fan do when his team wins a trophy? The primary cause of the rivalry between the two arose out of their decision to move from Woolwich to Highbury in 1913. Which football team uses the most toilet paper?Arsenal. Turn off the PlayStation. Three Men A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. replied her husband. Taking enjoyment from the travails of rival clubs and players is football's dark matter: a constant force, essential to the very structure of the universe, but lurking murkily in the background. A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. Q: Why did god invent alcohol? Q: What do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit? A: The tea stays in the cup longer! Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly? Required fields are marked *. Q: Why do Tottenham fans suck at geometry? asks Lukas . Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. Whats the difference between Liz Truss and Tottenham Hotspur?Liz Truss has no sons. FREE BETS:GET OVER 2,000 IN NEW CUSTOMER DEALS, One user tweeted: "Arsenal have lost their manners. TwiceFC Arsenal Funny JokesFire brigade phones Arsene Wenger in the early hours of Sunday morning "Mr Wenger sir, Highbury is on fire! Q: What does a Spurs fan do when his team has won the Champions League? ', Megan Fox was thinking: 'That Arsenal fan must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Spurs fan and got slapped for it.'. Tottenham 0-2 Arsenal: Aaron Ramsdale attacked by fan after north London derby 15 January 2023 Premier League Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale was led away from the area after an. A: A cheat. It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. A: So Arsenal supporters can get laid too. Sporting Lisbon have a bad history with Arsenal while Tottenham might have inadvertently helped their rivals to success in Europe. Q: What does an Arsenal supporter and a bottle of beer have in common? If you use a smartphone, you can also use the drawer menu of the browser you are using. The Manchester fan said I'll have the chest 0 Comments. They said lets split it based on the soccer clubs we support. Meanwhile Arsenal have scooped eight trophies in that time having won the FA Cup and Community Shield four times each. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days.". Get insight to top players, instructions & drills and extensive coverage of equipment. Or why not treat yourself? A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. They slaughter the sheep and use their wool for warmth until they become hungry.The Hartlepool fan says, Im from Hartlepool so Ill have the heart. The Liverpool fan says, Im from Liverpool so Ill have the liver.At last, the Arsenal fan says, Urm Im not hungry.. The receptionist replies Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. 1) I don't get religion, believing in someone that did great things thousands of years ago in the hope they may do it again A bit like. Maybe Tottenham's inferiority complex is so pronounced that even as Tottenham manager Mauricio Pochettino tried to warn that no good would come of the obsession with finishing above Arsenal, it's because a self-destructive, self-fulfilling prophecy that resulted in Spurs taking only two points from their past four games of the season. Why are Tottenham Hotspur fans so bad at geometry?Because they never have any points. Arsenal fans still sing his name with pride and affection. Do you have any questions or comments? What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common? What are the three people you can never advise? They enter the weekend occupying the last of the Champions League qualifying places after 25 . An encyclopedia of football shirts and boots knowledge both past and present Mark has also been to the FA Cup and League Cup finals for FFT and has written pieces for the mag ranging on subjects from Bobby Robson's season at Barcelona to Robinho's career. Love my club. The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. You have a gun with two bullets. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? The man pauses for a moment before exclaiming, God! When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? A. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. Why did the Spurs have been forced to rename their ground White Lane?Because their Hart was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. He looked at the others and asked, "Who the hell is Martin Keown? Watch Champions League Live Tottenham fan kicks Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale in back after drama-filled end to Premier League clash It took place behind the Gunners' goal when Ramsdale. Q: What is the difference between a Tottenham supporter and a baby? Q: How do you keep a Gunners fan from masterbating? Here are the best Tottenham Jokes for you to share with your friends. Primary What trophy will Arsenal win this season?August invincibles. Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day? "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two the last of which was lifted in 1961. 40 Lyktan 8 yr. ago Funny you say that. When the police arrived they needed to examine the body so the policeman lifted the Spurs cap and looked at one breast, then he lifted the Watford cap and examined the other. It said it was to weak. Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito?A mosquito stops sucking. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. Q: What do you call 5 Arsenal fans standing ear to ear? The rude-abega. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. There was a problem. One turns to the other and says "Hey Arthur! Q: Why are Tottenham Hotspur jokes getting dumb and dumber? There was plenty for Arsenal fans to cheer about on Sunday, as they increased their lead at the top of the Premier League table to eight points, with a win over local rivals Tottenham Hotspur at Spurs' own ground. The Arsenal players understandably weren't happy with the situation and rushed over to defend their man of the match, especially due to an altercation with Richarlison. Well it does now. Suddenly, the driver saw a Tottenham supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. Laughing at Tottenham will sustain a lot of supporters during the summer, but asking Spurs to accept their place in football's grand design quietly invites Arsenal to do likewise. Ive let you down Ive let you down.Dont be stupid Diego, you got a draw against Spurs all by yourself. Mark White has been a staff writer on FourFourTwo since joining in January 2020, writing pieces for both online and the magazine. A: The bucket. "The other man replied "It's quarter to five. Q. A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! Career Day Its God, and he says, Welcome! Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy do Arsenal men like smart women?Opposites attract.Jokes About Arsenal FCWhat do you say to an Arsenal fan with a job? Why did the aliens land in the Emirates?Because theres no atmosphere. Both cars (with football stickers on windows) are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. Johnny comes to the front of the class. A: Dress her in an Arsenal jersey! "Because I'm not an Arsenal fan." There is, however, one exception. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. They decided not to press charges because it was 2 of one and half a score of the other. Save the cups!" The Liverpool supporter said I want the liver And Arsenal have poked fun at Antonio Conte's side by displaying a cheeky message on their official store. Whilst the away end was bouncing, one Arsenal fan was hiding in plain sight behind enemy lines, and went viral for showing off his Arsenal kit in the home end, without the steward noticing, as you can see in the video below. Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Spurs fan? To inquire about a licence to reproduce material, visit our Syndication site. Q: What is the difference between Arsenal and a cup of tea? He once saw Tyrone Mings at a petrol station in Bournemouth but felt far too short to ask for a photo. About every ten years a small team wins the EPL.86 Forest95 Blackburn04 Arsenal16 Leicester. Piers Morgan joked Arsenal don't need Mykhailo Mudryk as he watched his beloved side beat Tottenham. Recall that . Reckless Driver A: People would pass up a pair of Arsenal tickets. I hope you have enjoyed reading all of these Arsenal jokes as much as I have :DPlease feel free to read more about Arsenal FC from the links below Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it? Q: What is the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a cup of tea? What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. A: People would pass up a pair of Spurs tickets. 'The season's almost over!'. Have you all heard about the new Arsenal Bra?It has a whole lot of support but it doesnt have any cups. Twice. Go to Arsenal's store (opens in new tab). He writes, "Spurs fan saves friend from vicious animal. Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. How do you know Antonio Conte must have hurt his leg whilst at Tottenham Hotspur?He is always relying on Son and Kane. ", So the reporter starts again: "Gooner git kills family pet". (You can preview and edit on the next page), Upload 1-4 Pictures or Graphics (optional). Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. A: Because Arsenal supporters have started to make them up themselves. Why should Spurs have some talks with Theresa May?They got out of Europe within 2 months. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. "Hate Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit ? document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()). Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? )Wenger you going to stop being so mediocre, Arsenal? Then Snow White says, "How do I know I'm the most beautiful woman in the world? He phoned her up and said "what the fuck's going on? Why dont they drink tea at White Hart Lane?Because all the cups are in Manchester. ?He kept throwing out the W's.Best Arsenal JokesWhat do you call a fly inside an Arsenal fans head ? "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. Whats so special about Spurs from all other EPL clubs?They are a social experiment set up to see how far they can mentally and physically push a human being. 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. The picture looked completely different a couple of weeks ago with Mikel Arteta's side sitting above Spurs in the Premier League table ahead of the North London . Be realistic.Arsenal fan: Okay. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is an Arsenal supporter. Theres nothing to worry about, lad, said the elderly chap standing next to himIts like the bombs during the war. Q: Why did God make Tottenham Hotspur supporters smelly? Q: Why did god invent alcohol? That was the case on Sunday as well, as one Spurs fan kicked Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale at the end of the match, as the England player collected his things. ", boasts the little girl. After though, Mikel Arteta dragged them all away and got them instead to celebrate with the away fans, hilariously having to take extra care to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. Your email address will not be published. "Intelligence reports indicate that the latest additions to the Ukranian arsenal are damaged and outdated, and many won't pose any threat to us at all." When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. What do you say to a Spurs fan with a good-looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo. What should you do? Q: What is the difference between an Arsenal supporter and a baby? So far, he has been punched, spat at, kicked, and verbally abused. Never too bad. Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? Read ourTransfer News Live blogfor the very latest rumours, gossip and done deals, Moment Aston Villa's Leon Bailey inhales 'laughing gas' after all night party, Mason Greenwood's England future revealed after rejecting country switch, Nicky Butt quit Man Utd as he couldnt stand players beating him to team, Man Utd considering THREE options for Mason Greenwood if he stays at club, News Group Newspapers Limited in England No. But a defeat at Old Trafford might need some players to reflect on their poor performances before quickly pulling back. One week later the three were all killed in a car crash. He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. Q. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. Theres an article here about a man who traded his wife for an Arsenal season ticket. The two examples show that football fans are capable of behaving impeccably, because usually it's one or two morons ruining it for everyone else. Then guy from ARSEnal saysi'm not hungry. Student : Manchester United lost because their defenders were Young, Small and Blind, A woman was reading a newspaper one morning and said A her husband, Real Madrid's Toni Kroos appeared on a podcast with his brother, Felix, who slammed FIFA's decision to award former Arsenal goalkeeper, Emi Martinez, the Best Goalkeeper gong, saying it was a . To make sure you never miss out on your favourite NEW stories, we're happy to send you some reminders, Click 'OK' then 'Allow' to enable notifications, .css-1diosym{color:black;}@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.css-1diosym{color:#fff;}}Published7:57,16 January 2023 GMT@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.css-jirzs7{color:#72B97D;}}| Last updated8:01,16 January 2023 GMT. A burglar. Plus tips on how to play better and interviews with the biggest names. A: Nice tattoo "Great idea" says the second cat "I support Hartlepool. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Tottenham Hotspur supporter." Thank you for signing up to Four Four Two. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". Knock, knock. . Ill sacrifice my life for yours.But the girl replied, No need for that, there are 2 parachutes left.How is that possible? asked Pope.The girl replied, That Arsenal FC Manager took my school bag.. The Rivalry of Tottenham Hotspur - Arsenal. "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." A: A good start! Would Any Arsenal Supporter Wear A Tottenham Shirt For Money? All rights reserved. What is the similarity between Arsenal on top of the EPL table and an elephant on top of a tree?Nobody knows how it got there but everybody knows how it will fall. Hate Jokes Arsenal You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. Arsenal's crown in 2004. "A Pedophile?" There are three friends. He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. There's nothing worth craping on! ", Meanwhile one simply stated: "Quality from the Arsenal website.". All of the sudden Tom Thumb says, "You know, how do I know I'm the world's smallest man? Do you have some pictures or graphics to add? Visit our corporate site (opens in new tab). "Arsenal Story JokesA woman buys a car in London. The former Sky Sports presenter has long had a bee in his bonnet about the Arsenal manager being outside of his technical area for long periods of matches. A: Because they never have any points. You have a gun with two bullets. Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. Primary "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and hit that Arsenal bastard again, harder. Save all royalty-free picture. "A large amount of our best weapons and munitions have just been captured, sir.". ?A Space Invader.Jokes About ArsenalHow long has Tony Adams played for Arsenal?Donkeys years.Arsenal Football Club JokesHow many Arsenal players does it take to change a light bulb?Eleven - one to change it and ten to play the offside trap.Jokes About ArsenalHeard the one about David Seaman?He never keeps a clean sheet.Arsenal FC JokesWhen Gazza scored at Wembley, Seaman was all over the place.Arsenal FC JokesWhat's the difference between Paul Merson and the rest of the Arsenal team?One takes dope and the rest are dopes.Jokes About ArsenalWhat have Paul Merson and a can of Coca Cola got in common?Their both red and white and full of coke.Jokes ArsenalWhy is the pitch at Highbury so green?Because they keep putting lots of shit on it.Arsenal jokesHow come Arsenal fans don't fall asleep during a match?The smell of their ground keeps them awake.Arsenal JokesWhat's the highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Pro-plus (sleep repellant).Best Arsenal JokesWhat's the second highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Horlicks.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat is the difference between Paul Merson and a former Arsenal player, surname George?One Charlie shoots, the other shoots Charlie.Arsenal JokesWhat is the difference between Jon Pertwee and Ray Parlour?Ray Parlour still looks like Worzel Gummidge.Arsenal FC JokesAt Highbury, what is the difference between the words 'disciplinary' and 'football'? "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Gunners supporter." Why is Arsenal gutted at the collapse of the European Super League?They were really looking forward to the possibility of finishing as high as 12th place. Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and a Spurs striker? "The Sun", "Sun", "Sun Online" are registered trademarks or trade names of News Group Newspapers Limited. Johnny comes to the front of the class. AN Arsenal fan has trolled Tottenham by wearing a Gunners shirt in the home end during the North London derby. A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. (Whos there?)Gunner. "Because I'm not an Arsenal fan." The bad news for Arsenal is that in much the same way as Tottenham's repetitious subordination to their rivals has become a punchline, Arsenal invite jokes of their own by being stuck in their own time loop of disappointment. Your Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans pics are available in this web. "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". He always reacts like that when we lose a match. 'Look at this, dear. You can explore arsenal fifa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. How do you make an Arsenal fan a millionaire?Tell them to save up for the champions league final. Santa: What do you want for Christmas?Arsenal fan: I want a dragon.Santa: Come on. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean arsenal championship dad jokes. How many Arsenal fans does it take to change a lightbulb?None. Instagram - Facebook - YouTube@SoccerManiak801. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Spurs strikers?Clinton can score. Under an interim coach, which new players can break through for Brazil? Coach Ivan plays on passion but walkoff is a step too far, Transfer Talk: Bayern still keen on Kane despite new Choupo-Moting deal, Reiten's, Maanum's parallel paths in Norway intersect in League Cup final.